The Classical Parent

Later today, we will have the joy of “coming together” to sing and pray and hear God’s word in an all-school Zoom chapel. “Zoom chapel.” How many of us knew what those words meant just two months ago? They would have sounded very strange back then, but not any longer. One obvious reason for their new familiarity is that Zoom has very quickly become part of our daily lives. The second reason is that this technology is enabling us to do something we have always done, something we were made to do: worship our Lord together.

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People are experiencing this pandemic in a variety of ways. Some are looking for meaningful ways to use extra time. Others are asking, “What extra time?!” Some are struggling with grave situations; others are worrying about or grieving lesser but still significant circumstances. One thing we all share is the desire to continue to prepare our children for “lives well-lived.” In this CCE Corner, we want to look at some “best practices” for continuing your Trinitas education at home. Not surprisingly, they tend to be many of the same practices, attitudes, and habits that work well at school during more “regular” times and in many other areas of life. As a community committed to Christian classical education, it is fitting that we would look not only to tradition but also to each other. Thank you for contributing to this conversation and for furthering our shared mission in your homes.

When things feel out of control, turn toward the One who is in control.

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Unprecedented times. So they have been called, and so they are. And yet, our current crisis unites us with Christians from other times and places as we’re called to stand firm. Pastor Peter Jonker of LaGrave CRC provided an encouraging sermon on how Christians are prepared for such a time as this. It’s based on I Peter 5:6-11:

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.”

You can find the March 22 sermon in LaGrave’s sermon archive. We are thankful for all clergy and lay leaders who continue to shepherd their flocks and minister to our city during this crisis.

Our previous CCEC was about managing fear, frustration, and failure in school. In the short time since then, the Coronavirus has us all facing new frustrations and fears. But, as we see in C.S. Lewis’s sermon, “Learning in Wartime,” these are not really new. You can read his sermon here. If you prefer a shorter commentary of the sermon’s main points, read this. Lewis’s words, rooted in Scripture, encourage us to live our daily lives as best we can. In our next CCE Corner, we’ll return to our scheduled lesson and talk about the importance of friendship in this time of separation.

You’ve heard of the 3 R’s of education (Reading, wRiting, and aRithmetic). What about the three F’s? In this CCEC, we talk about Fear, Frustration, and Failure.

Lesson 9. Keep calm and choose well: managing fear, frustration, and failure.

When I asked my children what advice they might give students and parents in their first year of classical school, one of them said, “Tell them things like lit and comp will be really hard for the first year.”

There will very likely be times when you hear something like: “The other kids know so much more!” “I don’t know what the teacher wants!” “I can’t do this!” “I’m gonna fail.”

Over the years, we’ve learned that it’s the parent’s job in these situations to calm everyone down. Yourself first. It’s like they tell you on an airplane: “Put on your own oxygen mask, before tending to your child.” You may be thinking, “I don’t know what the teacher wants either!” But, don’t let your child see your stress. Calmly try to calm him or her down.

We have a few ideas to share: Read the rest of this entry »

In this CCE Corner, we return to the lessons we’ve learned about thriving in a classical Christian school. In this lesson, we move from the philosophical to the practical with some age-old advice.

Lesson 8. A place for everything and everything in its place; a time for everything and a season for every activity under the heaves: managing your stuff and your time.

Our CCE Corner lessons have been about habits that help students succeed not only in school, but also in life. Lesson 8 is largely about teaching children how to show up at the right place, on time, and well-prepared. Trinitas gives parents tips at the beginning of the school year about managing stuff and time. They include the following. Read the rest of this entry »

In this CCEC, we’re taking a break from the lessons learned about thriving in a Christian classical school to reflect on the vision we have for Trinitas. Sometimes we run across words that so perfectly capture what we’re thinking that we have to share them in their entirety. That’s the case with the following quotation from a review of the recent film adaptation of Louisa May Alcott’s Little Women. (If you haven’t seen the movie, you should.) When we read what Joy Clarkson wrote about this classic story in The Forma Review, we thought, “That’s just what we’re trying to do at Trinitas!”

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In our last CCE Corner, we talked about how looking for the good helps students thrive. In this lesson, we talk about looking for the good in authority.

Lesson 7. Respect authority: listening to those who know more

The writer of Hebrews instructs us to, “Obey those who rule over [lead] you, and be submissive, for they watch out for your souls, as those who must give account. Let them do so with joy and not with grief, for that would be unprofitable for you.” (Hebrews 13:17)

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In Lesson 5, we talked about letting go of perfectionism so your child and you can thrive in a classical school. In this lesson, we look at how what we say (or don’t say) can help us to do this. It’s a brief lesson; but, “even though it’s simple, it’s not easy.”

Lesson 6. If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all: looking for the good

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Lesson 5. Don’t let the best be the enemy of the good: letting go of perfection

Sometimes our desire for the best education for our children can be problematic. In his essay, “Learning in War-Time”, C.S. Lewis says something we appreciated especially during the early years of Trinitas: “The only people who achieve much are those who want knowledge so badly that they seek it while the conditions are still unfavourable. Favourable conditions never come.”

“Unfavourable” certainly described some of the conditions of our first year. As it turned out, our school moved three times that year. Someone suggested we change our tagline to something more trendy: “Trinitas—a school without walls.” In those early years, we also had a fair amount of teacher turnover for part-time positions – always in August.

Those were pretty significant imperfections. There were plenty of others, but our families were committed to making this wonderful thing work. Sometimes it is easier to persevere when things outside your control happen. But, what about those things that seem to be in your control? What about when, for example, you see imperfections and you feel like you could be doing things better yourself? Or, you think the grass must be greener on the other side of that other school’s fence. You’ve invested time and money and you’re used to doing or having things your own way. First, look for the good (we’ll have more to say about that in Lesson 6). Second, remember to be humble, charitable, and patient. All good things take time.

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